Happy, Fun Adventure Times in a Fantasy World

Happy Fun Adventure Times in a Fantasy World Act II: Episode 4

Worst. Roadtrip. Ever. Of All Time.

Last time on Happy Fun Adventure Times in a Fantasy World… Our heroes finally made it to Blackfen Stronghold, the biggest orc city in the west, which rolled out the red carpet for their arrival. Mystified by the warm welcome, the gang met with Ana, an ancient orc grandma. She cleared up the mystery by revealing Lord Valdur’s true identity: The Chosen One, destined to unite the clans and bring harmony back to the world. Naturally, The Chosen One took this all in with his usual, humble grace and promised to do everything in his power to protect his people and restore world order. Just kidding. 

Big Green Harry Potter, Ron Weasely, Scabbers, and Serious Black enjoyed a feast with all the orcs except one group that seemed really peeved for some reason. After some investigation, they learned that the chieftan’s son was the leader of that one group, and being none too pleased with the arrival of some impostor chosen one, was spoiling for a fight. Ron Weasely saw this as a good opportunity for the gang to earn some respect, so he low-key mentioned that Harry Potter was planning on fighting the orcish heir. This caused some drama and the two parties agreed that there would be a duel between the seconds, Sirious XM Radio and Goyle, to resolve the question of whether Valdur or that orc chief's son whose name I can't remember ( <s>Korok? Karok? Kotor? Kakarot</s>? Something with a K…) has a better little sister. Meanwhile, in return for Ron scoring him an invitation to a duel, Harry Potter sent a giant orc to beat up Ron Weasely and then had him carted off to a brothel outside of the town (Scabbers followed). Overall, the gang did some shenanigans in the town and some other stuff, and then the day of the duel came. With bare fists, Sirius White plowed into Goyle, knocking the big orc out quickly. Then, the orc chief’s son took offense at some concern or another and challenged The Chosen One to a fight with weapons this time, no magic. Unsurprisingly, The Chosen One won (he’d be a lousy chosen one if he didn’t) and everyone hugged it and became friends. Totally.

After wrapping up their business in town, the gang hit the road again, this time traveling south to the Teraphoban Empire. Everything was going along really well and the group was actually making good time, but that all changed when the <s>fire nation</s> Teraphoban Empire attacked. Well, they didn't attack our fearless heroes — they actually attacked the town of Katun. Allegedly. Nobody has any proof.

The group decided to move forward and hunt down the baddies with Shovel Knight scouting ahead through the forest. After a day's march, the forest eventually got pretty chill (literally) and, upon noting a massive storm moving in, the group decided to look for shelter. Upon finding an old, abandoned and scorched village, Shovel Knight notified the others and they stopped to make camp as a blizzard hit. Now, with the wind howling like this swirling storm inside, Sad Woofer sits alone in an empty burned-out house, and the the rest of the gang is merrily trying to stay warm in a completely different empty burned-out house. What will happen next? Will the Great Mouse Detective bake more cookies? Will The Chosen One decide what he wants for dinner for once? Will Shovel Knight find the bad guys? Will Sad Woofer let it go? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON Happy Fun Adventure Times in a Fantasy World Act II, Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back.


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